Barometric pressure

Do you see hippos on my shoulders? It feels like it’s taking everything in me to keep myself upright. My feet feel like they are walking through mud. It’s raining, which is a blissful change during this drought, but I think only my mind and imagination appreciate it. I think my body harbors different feelings, heavy, humid, headachy feelings exacerbated by Ben’s streak of early risings (4-5am) and lots of visiting and people and busyness. It just feels like the world is hard to hold up tonight. And I got stuck in traffic today for the first time since moving to this town five years ago. We (Ben and I) were at an almost standstill for 30 some minutes without food, without being able to get Ben out of his chair. I held it together mostly, and Ben did well given the circumstances (we had to count a lot of trees to get through it, he is always calmed by counting). I had a rueful giggle thinking about people with road rage, and what they would do if a hungry, cranky toddler was added to the mix, one who was chanting “Caca, Caca!” during the thick of it (French for “Maman, I had a poo!”). Maybe they would melt and realize that it’s only traffic, that this little boy is so damn sweet to be able to tell us when he’s pooped. He has so many new words and signs, and it just feels like his brain is on warp speed! I am loving that. Books take on a whole new level of pleasure as he makes the fishy mouth pucker when he sees fish or can point out the animals you ask him to find. He is more clear about his needs (signs for “more food”, “all-done”) and it has given him agency. He is marveling at everything; this week it’s boats since my relatives have rented a summer home for a week on the St. Lawrence River. He points and exclaims “Wawa!” and some garbled version of “Dez a bo!” (there’s a boat). He is so delicious. It makes it all worthwhile.

E