Bending forward

Part 1: Jan.31, 2013

How do I feel? The best answer is PREGNANT! I know, such a blessing. How can I complain? Five years to get pregnant (not trying the whole time), and such a sweet pregnancy so far. I give deep, abiding props to all my friends and ladies out there who have known it to be rough (including A, nauseous for 9 months). Oh there have been symptoms, and I was hella moody for the first trimester! But it’s been a dream overall. This last week however marks the beginning of the end, and to celebrate, my pelvis has decided to throw a belated party! I feel like I’ve been doing the splits for 6 straight hours while being pummeled throughout the area by a swarm of angry imps bent on bruising me! I know they are the same imps that are helping me get ready for labour… But fellas, labour standards in Canada demand regular breaks! Arnica and baths are helping for sure. And thank Hindus for yoga! I love my prenatal class. Can't see my toes of course. Most of the time I feel like an geriatric hippo every time I move from sitting or lying to standing, grabbing my sides with accompanying “ugh” sounds and then limping lamely off to, you guessed it, the toilet. Again. I either laugh or whimper, sometimes both, because it’s so absurd looking. And they mean it when they say to slow down. I did too much yesterday (though I felt fabulously productive at the time), and ended up burning my arm on the frying pan, biting my unsuspecting spouses’ head off, and almost weeping from the sound of the hungry cats meowing their dinner requests while weaving around my legs and tripping me! NB: my good friend gave me an extraordinary osteopathic treatment which reconnected the energy flowing through my spine (and essential self) down to my pelvis, which I had diverted unnecessarily to the babe. My pelvis has felt pretty fab since (all things considered).

I couldn't resist painting my 38-week belly; it is a swirling ocean with an oroboros snake (wholeness of the universe) surrounding a bright golden light. Baby and I are both "snakes" in Chinese astrology.

Part 2: March 3, 2013

I am a day away from D-date. Wow. Currently I am sipping the Gatorade I bought for labour and eating saltines since the stomach bug that went around our house finally got me. Let me tell you, it is not comfortable to reach the toilet preggers! Talk about timing too. A has been frantically Googling early labour signs since many flu symptoms comply but really it is an honest to goodness bug. Thankfully our midwife said women don’t tend to go into labour sick as a self-preservation thing. I would be a mess. I am also currently listening to my fabulous birth mix, which could be called a dance party at an Ashram (holy community retreats). I hope I get to use it! Who knows what we’ll ever want or need in labour, but I know that chanting and a good beat keep me positive and focused and get me to move. We have inflated the birth pool. Well, actually our donor and friend came over with this massive air compressor thing, we put concert grade ear muffs on Ben, and he inflated the whole thing in what felt like 5 minutes. Oh the things we’ll remember! I hope I get to use the pool too. At this point everyone is anxious, A can’t sleep, Ben’s bedtimes have been a gong show because he can feel the tension. I am trying to stay relaxed and remember that this quiet time is short lived, that due dates are so approximate as to be ridiculous, and that one way or another, babies come out! I am scared though, not terrified, more apprehensive. I worry about back labour, meconium, Mercury Retrograde's influence (though I think it could be good), hospital transfers, c-births (after much processing I have come to accept internally that they remain births, and it's nicer to call them so than "sections") and of course the baby’s wellness. I worry about making myself proud. It’s odd to just be going through my days knowing the most intense thing to ever happen to me is coming any minute. As much of a mind trip as feeling feet and toes through tummy skin! We are very excited to meet their owner! Wish us luck!

E